Chunk’s Metal-Oke Madness Round Seven

By Ashley Bailey

Chunk’s Metal-Oke has become somewhat of a Mecca for Hull metalheads. It isn’t all that hard to see why; upon arriving I was sat in the beer garden with several other attendees as they drank the night away and soaked up the ambience, whilst a barbecue crackled in the background. The atmosphere was that of an all night party, and I was absorbed – despite only having been there for ten minutes at that point. The rain eventually put the BBQ out of action, but nothing could dampen the spirits of the revellers; not even the disapproving looks from the passing local ‘wild life’ that inhabit Beverley Road like boils on a plague sufferer.

After a sufficient level of alcohol had been consumed (including a pint of lager that was spilt on my lap) the majority moved indoors so they could submit their requests. Inside, it was fairly busy – though I was told it was less busy than it had been on previous evenings (which had approached the capacity of a tin of sardines.) After Chunk kick started proceedings the volunteers slowly approached the stage, selecting songs from a literal A-Z of metal, rock, punk, nu-metal and alternative catalogue that featured everything from Megadeth to Paramore, and ZZ Top to The Sex Pistols. One by one they came, sung their hearts out and went, all for the sacred free shot. The quality of performances varied greatly, though the entire point of Karaoke is for entertainment purposes and the worse singers are infinitely more enjoyable. Which is the crux of why these nights are proving to be incredibly popular, even amongst those with the fleeting interest in such genres; it is a chance to get battered and belt out Metallica’s “Wherever I May Roam”. Usually the karaoke nights Hull has to offer feature only the latest pop songs or the cheese of the 80’s, and as is the norm usually ignore 40 years of metal.

Amongst the songs sung were “Whiskey In a Jar”, “God Save the Queen”, “Testify” and “Fuck Her Gently”. Paramore proved to be a popular choice amongst the ladies, whilst Queen remained top over all. Whilst the majority of the singers sounded like a drunken R2D2, there were a few that were pleasant to listen to. Former Iron Harvest vocalist Woody’s rendition of “Heaven and Hell”, a cover of “You Shook Me All Night Long” and Chunk’s fantastic version of “Fat Bottomed Girls” are amongst the highlights. The top moments of the evening, however, were DJ Shaun Hudson singing Nickelback and a mildly terrifying cover of Rage Against the Machine’s “Testify”, which sounded like the singer was caught in a rage against the sound system.

Our intrepid reporters also risked death by social embarrassment and took to the stage. By this point we were on the wrong point of the George Best drinking scale, so all trepidation had long since gone. Lauren took to the stage to destroy Megadeth’s Symphony of Destruction and I attempted to fight The Clash’s I Fought the Law. Whilst it was a surprisingly fear free experience, I couldn’t take my eyes off the karaoke machine in a bid to keep perfectly in time. To those in attendance with a vivid imagination it would probably have looked like I was attempting to serenade the bloody machine, like some sort of Asimov slash fiction. In my mind we came off as heroically as the Spartans as did when they made their last stand in 300, but alas that was probably not the case. So I left the stage realising that though my singing career may have to be put on hold until a world wide phenoma renders the populace deaf, I had recieved and enjoyed my free shot.

All in all Chunk’s Metal-Oke Round Seven was entertaining to say the least, it is easy to see why this has become a regular event. Good varied music, great entertainment, reasonable alcohol prices and an enjoyable atmosphere make this an unbeatable and unmissable event. Provided you are not a capitalist shill and are forced to work your weekends, then I would recommend this to anyone. I sincerely hope that it becomes a permanent fixture in Hull’s nightlife; imagine, long after we have all succumbed to the ravaging of aging, a mangled howling of Bad Moon Rising will still continue to emanate from those hallowed halls.